dominospizzadelivery:

"Hey can u check if that milk went bad?"

*opens fridge*

*milk has leather jacket on smoking a cigarette*

"It’s bad alright"

panducky:

if you kiss my neck and bite my lip your pants are coming off.

(Source: reshirum)

today my mom laughed for 30 minutes about this

image

(Source: loueeh)

adiostoreadumb:

theanti90smovement:

Tumblr logo is rainbow because the letters of tumblr stand for the letter of the colors of the rainbow

Ah yes my favorite colors

image

Ted, urange, mellow, breen, llue, and rurple.

shouldnt:

you shouldnt do this

you shouldnt do that

SHOULDNT YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP

tungstens:

we all have a favorite eyebrow

(Source: fzur)

fierceasheck:

life hack: crash ur car into a bridge. you won’t care, you’ll love it

gamsee:

IT MAKES ME REALLY HAPPY WHEN PEOPLE REFER TO ME AS THEIR FRIEND WHOA. FRIEND

discomforted:

lol i wonder if teachers just sit there and laugh while marking my school tests